Whobody?

Jeff, looking into the toilet: "Whobody flushed?" (I guess that's as good a word as "somebody"?)

much, much soap

One day Jeff wanted me to refill the foamy soap dispenser in the bathroom. He said, "There's not much!" So I said, ok, you may find the soap in the cupboard. So he pulled out the refill bottle and said, "Here's much much soap!"

It's so easy to see only the weariness of motherhood (of little ones) -- the constant "Mommy!" calls... the listening to some litany of something that matters to some child, while at the same time trying to remember the other things your mind was juggling at the moment... all the physical needs of little ones that demand Mommy's doing them (dressing, bathing, getting food ready, bathroom needs, brushing teeth)... more arbitrating between two who fuss at each other, more reminders to love one another, more frustration at the sin so evident from sinful hearts... it can be hard to step back from all that in order to rejoice at the little things of childhood, so fleeting. The things that make older mothers say "enjoy this time!" because they miss those little things, and wish they had enjoyed them more (though they don't necessarily explain HOW to do that while dealing with all the little "trials" at the same time). The funny things kids say, the childish likes that will disappear soon, the trust in parents. It's easy to "not have time" to sit holding my child or reading to her. To make all the urgent things become more important than what I'll really wish I had done with my kids while they were little.

Sometimes it takes seeing what I don't have, to make me thankful for what I have. I don't (as far as I know!) have a child with a terminal or chronic illness. I don't have widowhood. I don't have barrenness or infertility. I don't have a husband who gambles away his paycheck or comes home in drunkenness or anger. My children are not AIDS orphans in Africa, with no hope and no help. I have the means to feed them (that's an understatement) and a place for them to sleep. And physical health to get up and care for them and (try to) manage our home, and homeschool. And most of all - I have Jesus! I have forgiveness through Him for all my sins! And therefore - even if I had all those things I don't wish for, it would be ok. Because I have Him.

Oh may I remember this. Day to day, moment by moment. I have Jesus! And what He has called me to do, is be here, now, to be a wife and a mother, to my family. To do it, for Him. If I remembered that more often -- looked up instead of down or around me -- then I would be so much more happy and content.

Yes, but...

No matter what our circumstances of life, we can always say, "Yes, but - all my sins are forgiven, by His blood!" and this ought to rule our minds, and to spur us on to live for Him, in whatever place He has put us right now.

( -- from Andy Dunkerton's sermon on 9/12/2010 PM - http://sermons.grbc.net will have it up soon).

News!

I suppose our news is public now: we're expecting #4, due in April, Lord willing! I'm thankful for God's help in dealing with more effects of pregnancy than I remember in the other ones, and glad to be feeling a little better more recently. God is good.

The kids are all growing...


Katherine is 6, and we're homeschooling, though since NC doesn't require kids to be in school till age 7, we have almost a year to figure it all out before it has to be official. She also gets to go to some "enrichment" classes one morning a week for some practice in language (recitation, book reading, etc.), music, and science review / experimentation. She looks forward to that.

Emily with birthday presents (she likes lions)

Her favorite presents (I think): 3 lions, and a booster car seat

Emily is 4, and doing much of the homeschooling along with Katherine. She still loves dolls and mothering things (or younger children). She and Katherine also got to start some piano lessons from a friend this year. Katherine really loves it, and Emily is getting into the swing of it as well.

Playing at The Magic House kids' museum in St. Louis

Jeff turned 2 in May, and is certainly a boy. Loves to throw things... loves his cars and balls - and still likes babies too. He recently learned how to get up and down the ladder to the top bunk of the bunkbed all by himself.

David is plugging away at his contract position at Cisco in Durham. It's probably not a position that gives very good long-term career prospects, but we're thankful for a job and income, since was without work for several months at the start of the year.

Lydia is trying to keep up with homeschooling and meals and laundry (and very thankful for all the dishes David does for her). The house will get clean someday... the kids are getting big enough to vacuum and such, so maybe she'll be able to teach them to take over more of that. They like earning money for collecting the trash or folding laundry, etc.

Lydia and the kids enjoyed (well, mostly) a very long trip to see all the relatives we could in 2 weeks, stopping first in Lookout Mtn to spend a few days and pick up Mom, then going with her to Iowa to see Esther and her family, and back through St. Louis... finally driving through Chattanooga on the way back to drop Mom off again, and going on to N. Augusta to see Matthew & his family before heading home. It was long, but it was good to see everyone again, even just for a few days.

gracious, merciful, bountiful!

I love the Lord, because he has heard
my voice and my pleas for mercy...

Gracious is the Lord, and righteous;
our God is merciful...

Return, O my soul, to your rest;
for the Lord has dealt bountifully with you.

(Ps.116:1,5.7)

the wisest?

It always amazes me to read about Solomon being the wisest person ever... yet he disobeyed (disregarded?) the 3 commands God gave explicitly to kings: don't go get horses from Egypt, don't get lots of wives (they'll turn your heart away), and don't amass lots of silver and gold.

You would think that a wise person would first of all pay attention to God's commands. I guess it must show that human wisdom is not the same as God's wisdom. That God's foolishness is wiser than men. And to warn us that no amount of human wisdom (in parenting or anything else) will offset our disregarding of the things God explicitly tells us to do (e.g. parents: don't provoke your children to wrath, but raise them in the fear and admonition of the Lord).

(Deut.17:16-17. 1Kings 10:21-11:8. 1Cor.1:25. Eph.6:4)

Jesus only!

Jesus really did do it all. "By this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be my disciples." (Jn.15:8). Not, "by this my Father is glorified, that you keep lots of laws" - for Jesus is already our righteousness (1Cor.1:30). And when Jesus was asked, “What must we do, to be doing the works of God?” He answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” (Jn.6:28-29). Bearing fruit is a result (almost a side effect, not something you aim for) of abiding in Jesus - "Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing." (Jn.15:5).

So focus on Jesus! Determine to know nothing and be identified by nothing except "Jesus Christ and him crucified." (1Cor.2:2). Do everything for Him - "Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ." (Col.3:23-24).

Ultimate Homeschool Expo 2010

This online Homeschool Expo sounds great! A conference you don't have to leave the house to attend, and freebies besides.

Katie's Homeschool Cottage is giving away a free ticket to the Expo.

Katherine

Katherine often gets enthralled with one particular thing at a time... her most recent "kicks" are these.

1) Pilgrim's Progress (they are reading an abridged version in Sunday School), especially Pilgrim and his burden. This started sometime last fall, and then she wanted to pretend to be Christian and have a burden on her back. And find all the hymns about burdens ("Cast Thy Burden on the Lord" etc.).

2) Then it switched to pigs. Judy Rogers' song "Isabelle is a Pig" about a little girl who though dressed up in pretty clothes, has a horrible temper and likes to pitch a fit when things don't go her way - like a pig with a ring in his nose, who then wallows in the mud. The ring doesn't make the pig look good when it is in the mud. Pretty clothes don't make you look nice when you are throwing a tantrum. Anyway. So she gets on a kick about pigs, pretends to BE Isabelle (what was the point of the song??), and sings the song incessantly.

3) Then most recently, she read the "Three Billy Goats Gruff" and got on a kick about goats and the troll. Everything goat. Find all the Three Billy Goats Gruff stories. And any other stories about goats or trolls. Draw them, make models of the story out of Bristle Blocks or any other toys lying around, act out the story (with our indoor slide becoming a bridge and some 2nd person accommodating and being the troll). She picked a set of plastic animals that included 2 goats in it, for a birthday present.

She's also very creative and constantly thinks of things to make out of paper (a ring! a basket! a card for someone, with drawings or cutout holes or other interesting bits). She likes "jewels" (like those transparent flat "marbles" you use in floral arrangements).

She's our Katherine!

floor map!

Mom, this is for you! I thought you'd like to see it finished.

My Mom bought all the stuff to make this floor world map for me. I just assembled it and finally finished it today. It has Peltex double-sided iron-on stabilizer in the middle of it, with the world map on one side and some red fabric as a backing. I hope we can use it with our little plastic animals from around the world to show where they are from, etc. (among other things).

math time

Made it through math! Seems a victory every day that it happens. (Katherine is in the middle of Saxon 2. She likes math, or at least "gets it" fairly easily, but doesn't care for the time it takes to complete the worksheets involved.)

one defining Truth

Weary (too many nights up too late)
Didn't get any homeschooling done - kids went outside (what else is spring for?)
Little boy throwing up (at least it was easy to clean up) and again
Stinky training pants to clean (but he made it there the next time - has the runs)
Two little girls, friends hiding golden easter eggs for each other (yet competitors, each with her selfish heart)
Flowers to identify from weeds in the yard (but a fruitless search online to find their names)

"This is what matters most: You're forgiven! You have hope! Your hope is based on the sacrifice of Jesus. So let's not view this day any other way. Let this day be governed by this one defining truth."

"God has addressed our most serious problem: sin and judgment. This perspective has a transforming effect in the midst of the daily troubles and inconveniences of life."
(C.J.Mahaney - The Cross Centered Life, pp.55,57)

funny words

Jeff, almost 2, will answer "oh, yeah!". It's funny. Might be prefaced by his saying "where's Pooh??" (his favorite Pooh bear which he sleeps with). Then when directed to where it is, if you say "do you see it?" he might say, "oh, yeah!"

If he wants food, he might go in the kitchen and say, "I would like.... mini-bites!" (chocolate mini bites shredded wheat). Or "how 'bout... goldfish!" (I must say "how about..." a lot.) A "wipe" is a "woop". Sometimes "Pooh" is "Pee-oo".

His current refrain is, "WOOK, Mommy!" (or Daddy or whoever happens to be around.) "Wook! Wook" - as in, "look, look!" as he does something he wants you to look at.

Sometimes he's saying good-bye to someone (like his Daddy who is working in the office), and he says, "Bye! I'll wave!" and then leaves the room. (We like to wave to Daddy from the front door when he leaves the house to go somewhere.)

"Hold me" comes out as "Hed you! Hed you!" - unless I ask him what the right way to say it is, upon which he says "hold me please!".

Another funny phrase is "doesn't do!"... e.g. if I say "do you need to go potty more?" he might say "doesn't do!"

the good things are to come

Reading Mark 11 this morning. Here is Jesus, King and Lord of all. Coming into Jerusalem - on a donkey?? Possessing all authority, cleaning the temple of commerce. Yet He always is willing to not be recognized as Lord; to accept a lowly place, to be unknown, to be misunderstood - and takes it all humbly. Content to be in His Father's hand, wherever He has put Him. Content and willing to be "servant of all" (Mark 10:44-45).

Maybe when you know with a settled conviction that -
- this is not home, but I am only a servant here on a mission where I was sent
- my good things are not here, but to come after death
- my honor is not from here, but bestowed by my Father after I die

perhaps that makes you willing to be ridiculed, unnoticed, misunderstood, mistreated, deprived of rightful honor or possessions. Because you know this is not "it" for me. This is a temporary condition, my life here. I'm not here to be liked by anyone - I'm here to serve Jesus in whatever way He wants, wherever He wants me to be. He will give the honor and the possessions and everything else I didn't get here - when I get Home.

So rather than a "I deserve my good things" American mentality - O may God give me a "I am content to be an unpraised servant like Jesus" mentality. The good things are yet to come!

verses from Joel

“Yet even now,” declares the Lord,
“return to me with all your heart,
with fasting, with weeping, and with mourning;
and rend your hearts and not your garments.”
Return to the Lord your God,
for he is gracious and merciful,
slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love;
and he relents over disaster.
Who knows whether he will not turn and relent,
and leave a blessing behind him...?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I will restore to you the years
that the swarming locust has eaten,
the hopper, the destroyer, and the cutter,
my great army, which I sent among you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For the day of the Lord is near
in the valley of decision.
The sun and the moon are darkened,
and the stars withdraw their shining.
The Lord roars from Zion,
and utters his voice from Jerusalem,
and the heavens and the earth quake.
But the Lord is a refuge to his people,
a stronghold to the people of Israel.

(Joel 2:12-14, 25; 3:14-16)

Jeff

I was picking out Jeff's clothes today, and he saw them in the drawer, and pointing to something said "pink. pink." (He doesn't have anything pink in there.) I said something about it not being pink, so he said "yellow. yellow." (He didn't have yellow there either.) Then I pulled out a shirt and held it next to him to measure and see if it fit, and he said "too big." I said it wasn't too big, so he said "too tight" (which it wasn't either). Obviously he knows what a group of terminology refers to, though he doesn't have the specifics down.

peace

O LORD, you are my God;
I will exalt you; I will praise your name,
for you have done wonderful things,
plans formed of old, faithful and sure.

Behold, this is our God; we have waited for him, that he might save us.
This is the Lord; we have waited for him;
let us be glad and rejoice in his salvation.

You keep him in perfect peace
whose mind is stayed on you,
because he trusts in you.
Trust in the LORD forever,
for the LORD GOD is an everlasting rock.

O LORD, you will ordain peace for us,
for you have indeed done for us all our works.

(Is.25:1,9; 26:3-4,12)

today

Today I am looking down. Disappointed to not be pregnant this time around (how do my friends do it, who wait years to conceive??). Discouraged to have kids (sick again!) with colds enough to stay home from Sunday School, maybe church. Wondering why God put me here instead of on the mission field. Why God put others in the US who would rather be overseas. Doesn't He want missionaries? It's humbling to remember that God doesn't need me to get His work done. That He chooses my place and has put me here.

It's so hard to live here. Hard to escape the materialism that sucks me in. So easy to live my comfortable life and not want to be bothered by those in need, whether here or overseas. It seems easier to be a real Christian in a foreign country, where you have to trust God more every day for everything; where poverty stares you in the face on a regular basis and doesn't let you stay comfortable in your (relative) wealth.

Of course, God doesn't put you anywhere where it is impossible to obey Him, to be Christlike, etc. So obviously it must be possible to live as an on-fire, real Christian who lives sold-out for Jesus, here in America. I just wish I knew how. It feels like "my stuff" and "my life" just sucks me in like quicksand, and I don't know how to keep my eyes on the Kingdom.

Chalk it all up to "that time of the month" if you will, when emotions are more unstable anyway. But my guess is that those emotions and thoughts are really always there, under the surface somewhere, just kept from expression during the more emotionally stable days.

I know I'm supposed to be looking to Jesus, and resting in His providence, and His care for me, and the fact that He will complete what He began in me. That He put me here, and will teach me what He wants to teach me, here and now, in these circumstances. But at the moment I'm just human and being myself.

But will I ever change? Will I ever have the self-discipline to go to bed early so that I'm not tired and cranky the next day - especially on Saturday night? Maybe I need to pray more deliberately about things like that.

---------------------------------------

Maybe God knows that if I were a missionary, I would think myself to be doing something good for the Kingdom, rather than accepting a humble place of "nothing" where He has put me. Maybe if I had more children then I would be proud to have more than three (which I am so glad He has given me!). Maybe self-discipline would make me proud to be self-disciplined. Or health would make me proud that MY family was healthy.

What He really wants of me is to make me run to Jesus. There is no fruit without clinging to Him, resting in Him, trusting His righteousness. When will I learn this?!

"Many times the Lord loves you too much to give you the things you are praying for, because He wants to give you something better: Christ-likeness." (Paul Washer)

the Sullivans

Read their story if you are feeling sorry for yourself:

http://bandssullivan.blogspot.com/

And pray for this young man, left a widower with a little baby.

(Dawn (Gardner) Braun takes some of the pictures of the baby on this site).